Many changes lately in PS's Cotton On. First, Amos was transferred to Hougang and Nadz joined our big family. Then many part-timers quit. Serena, Amy, SohWynn, Xiu Zhen, Regina and etc. On Thursday, I was being told that Niza will be transferring to Hougang to join Amos and new SM will be coming in. And tonight I received a message from FooWen. It was a farewell message.

I missed all the fun I had with them. Though they always made fun of me and joke with me. Amos who always sent me home when we end work late. Niza who always jio for movie dates and FooWen, who always asked me not to do free labour. They all cared for me. I know that, I don't know if the new in-charge will be as close as I was with them, but I'm really gonna miss them all.

I think maybe I always thought to myself "aiya, not all three will be leaving." But this time round it's all three of them. Sometimes I don't even have to say anything they will what I'm thinking. It's the sudden losing of all your managers that made me just wanna cried out loud. [I'm crying while typing this actually.] I'm really lost, lost of words. All I know is that "They are not gonna appear in front of me so often as it used to be anymore." Like what people always tells you "People tend to treasure what they have lost more than when they have them." I'm feeling exactly the same way now.

I know I'm over reacting. I hate myself for being that. Because I never over react in any of these before. I know we can meet up and all. But it's won't be the same last time, no? No more crazy late night movies, drinking sessions until people starts bringing bottles home not knowing it and crazy clubbing experiences that I had with them. I just miss them.

Dear Niza, FooWen & Amos,

If you guys happen to find my blog and read this, I wanna say "Thank You & Sorry." I know you guys had to put up with my black faces or attitude problems while sometimes pissed you off. I'm Sorry. Thanks for teaching me a lot of stuffs. Not only stuffs about Cotton On, but stuffs about working life, an adult's life. I did learned a lot from all of you. It was an honour to have a chance to work with you all. Do keep in contact.

Love,
Linda.

I don't know how to start this post. Tears haven't been stopping after I reached home. I'm worried, the fear that I had 5 years ago is back. Why? Why again? This time round is only 25%, I know I should be thinking positive, I am. But I cant bear to see her suffer all these all over again. She had enough, shouldn't she be enjoying her life now and not suffer all these?! Sometimes I really hope that I could help her with all the pain she is suffering.

Friends, don't expect me to be smiling and joking like before for this period of time. I need to not be myself for once.

Felt sorry for Amos just now. Was going home with him after we ended work at 1am. He offered to send me home first, but I didn't want to. Instead, I sent him home. He was trying to pay for the cabfare then I just raised my voice and said "No need!" He was shocked, I know. [Sorry, once again.] Because I saw his expression.

I really hope all these will end soon. I never like to go through all these again. Why can't I just lead a normal life like any other girls/family?